Enchantment of Cleopatra

At length, she explained, actually since I was in my womb I had been betrothed to Raihana, whom I had never known. His mother Raihana is a close friend of the mother when she was married to the Mangkuyudan Solo boarding school "kataibu. We once promised, if you have a different kind of child you will order to strengthen your brotherhood. In a difficult mental struggle for days, I finally gave up. I obeyed my mother's wishes.

I don't want to disappoint mom. I want to be the morning sun in his heart, even though for that I have to sacrifice myself. I leave it with a bitter heart all round to mother. Although actually in my heart arises anxiety that just comes and does not know the reason. What is clear is that I already have my own criteria and dreams for my future wife. I can't do anything with the tears of my dear mother.

When I looked at Khitbah (application) at a glance at Raihana's face, right said my sister Aida, she was indeed a baby face and graceful. But I didn't find the beauty lines I wanted at all. My sister, Aunt Lia admitted that Raihana was beautiful, naturally beautiful, could be a commercial star for Lux, you know, authentic! Aunt Lia said. But my judgment is different, perhaps because I was so swept away by Cleopatra's Egyptian, incarnate, tall, beautiful white face, with a beautiful curved nose, distinctly Arabic clear round eyes, and red lips.

In the days leading up to my wedding, I tried to grow the seeds of my love for my future wife, but my efforts were always in vain. I want to rebel against my mother, but her calm face melts me. Wedding day is coming. Sitting divinely like a living corpse, empty hearted without love, the party was festive with four tambourine groups. Nabipun prayer rhythm feels piercing heart. I see Raihana smiling sweetly, but my heart feels sliced ​​and my soul struggles. My only hope is to get blessings from Allah SWT for my devotion to my mother whom I love. Rabbighfir li wa liwalidayya!

Like a newlywed, I was forced to be affectionate but not love, just because I was a human being used to reading His verses. Raihana smiles to expand, my heart cries over my lies and pretenses. Exactly two months, Raihana took me to a rented house on the outskirts of Malang. Begin a hollow life. I can not find any passion. How difficult family life without love. Eating, drinking, sleeping, and praying together with a creature named Raihana, my wife, but My God the seeds of my love have not yet grown. His soft voice felt bland, his calm face still felt strange.

Entering the fourth month, I felt the disgust of living with Raihana, this feeling just appeared. I tried to throw away this bad feeling, especially with my own wife who I should love and love. My attitude towards Raihana started differently. The more silent, indifferent, a little cynical, and even more sleep in the living room or workspace. I feel my life is in vain, studying abroad is futile, my marriage is in vain, my existence is in vain. Not only am I tormented, Raihanapun feels the same way, because he is an educated person, so he asks, but I answer "it's okay, sis, maybe I'm not yet an adult, maybe I still have to learn about marriage".

There was a shock that I caught on Raihana's face when I called 'mbak', "why did you call me mbak, I am your wife, do you not love me?" He asked with a sad face. "I know you are," I replied casually. silently looked down, shortly afterwards he sobbed while hugging my leg, "If you don't love me, don't accept me as a wife why do you say marriage contract? If in my behavior to serve you, there are still some who are not pleased, why don't you say and reprimand, why do you keep quiet, I must behave how to make you happy, please open your heart to be a space for my service, to perfect my worship. "

Raihana begged in full resignation. I cried shedding tears because Raihana was due to my propriety. The day went on, but our communication didn't work. We live like strangers but Raihana still serves me preparing everything for me. One afternoon I came home from teaching and rained, arrived at home after maghrib, my lips were pale, my stomach had not included anything except a glass of coffee made by Raihana this morning, indeed I left early in the morning because there was an appointment with a friend.

Raihana looked at me worriedly. "Mas is okay?" He asked worriedly. "Just take a shower with hot water, I was brewing, five minutes to boil," he continued. I took off all the wet clothes. "Mas the water is ready," said Raihana. I did not talk a word, I went straight to the bathroom, I forgot to bring a towel, but Raihana was standing in front of the door carrying a towel. "I made wedang ginger" I kept silent. I felt heartburn and nausea in my stomach I couldn't help it. I quickly ran to the bathroom and Raihana chased me and massaged my shoulders and nape like my mother did. "Mas caught a cold.

Usually if you catch a cold, what do you use, use balsam, white oil or herbal medicine? "Ask Raihana while leading me to the room." Mas don't just shut up, I don't know what to do to help Mas "" Usually dikerokin "I answered softly." Then the mas shirt is released yes, let Hana kerokin "said Raihana while my hand took off my shirt, I was like a little boy who was spoiled by his mother, Raihana patiently curled my back with the touch of his delicate hand, after finishing scraping, Raihana brought me a bowl of munghi kacang porridge, after that I lay down on the bed. the bed while memorizing the Khusyu Al-Quran, I was sad again and wanted to cry, Raihana was sweet but not as sweet as Cleopatra's tarnished Egyptian girls.

In sleep I dreamed of meeting Cleopatra, she invited me to dinner at her palace. "I have a niece named Mona Zaki, I'll introduce you later," said Queen Cleopatra. "He asked me to find him a prince, I see you fit and intend to introduce him to you". I prepare everything. Right at 7:00 I came to the palace, I saw Mona Zaki in her bridal clothes, very beautiful. The queen invited me to sit in a chair decorated with diamonds. I stepped forward, not yet had time to sit down, suddenly "Mas, wake up, it's half past four, mas haven't prayed Isha" said Raihana woke me up. I woke up feeling disappointed. "I'm sorry, bro, making Mas less like it, but Mas hasn't prayed Isha" softly Hana while taking off her head off, maybe she just finished the evening prayer.

Even though it was just a dream but it was beautiful, but unfortunately it was broken. I became even more displeased with him, he was the breaker of my hopes and my dreams. But if he is guilty, doesn't he do good to wake me up for Isha prayer. Then I find it difficult to live with Raihana, I don't know where it is difficult. Dislike is getting worse. I was really imprisoned in a ridiculous atmosphere. I can't like Raihana yet. I myself have never fallen in love, for some reason I can be colonized by the charm of Cleopatra's incarnation girls. "Mas, later in the afternoon there will be a qiqah event at Yu Imah's house. All families will come including your mother. We are invited too. Come on, we come together, it's not nice if we are hugged and the family doesn't come." Raihana's soft voice awakened my wandering in Ibn Hazm.

Slowly he placed a tray of my favorite ones and a glass of ginger. His hands were smooth rather shaky. I'm just cold. "Sorry ... sorry if it annoys Mas, forgive Hana," he said softly, then slowly left me in the study. "Ma'am! Eh sorry, I mean ... In ... Dinda Hana !, I called in a hoarse voice choked in my throat." Yes, Mas! "Said Hana immediately stopping her steps and slowly confronting me. He tried to smile, presumably he happily called "dinda". "His eyes lit up a little. "Te ... thank you ... dear, we leave together there, after the dhuhur prayer, God willing," I said, looking at Hana's face with a smile that I forced.

Raihana looked at me with a very bright face, there was a smile shining on her lips. "Thank you, Mas, we are really happy, where do you want to wear clothes, so that you can prepare it? Or just let it be chosen?". Hannah is so happy. This veiled woman is truly extraordinary, she still patiently devotes herself even though I am cold and indifferent to her all this time. I've never seen him face a sour face or don't like me. For the sad face. But the face he doesn't like has never been.

What kind of man am I, I curse myself. I cursed myself for this cold attitude. But, the drop of love I hope to wet my heart doesn't go down. The beauty of Cleopatra's incarnation aura? How do I get rid of him. I feel like the person who hates me the most in this world. The third son's recitation and qiqah program of Fatimah's elder brother Raihana brought a new history of our marriage sheet. Raihana's guess was right, we were hailed by the family, warmly welcomed, full of love, and full of pride. "Welcome to the newlyweds! Welcome to the most ideal couple in the family! Welcome Yu Imah and be greeted with happy applause from my parents-in-law and relatives and other relatives. Raihana's face is bright. Her eyes are sparkling with happiness.

Different with me, my heart cries when called ideal couple. What is ideal. Is it because I am an Egyptian graduate and Raihana is the best graduate in his campus and memorizes the Al Quran and is called ideal? Ideal for me is like Ibn Hazm and his wife, having mutual love that comes to the sacrifice of each other. Love that no longer allows betrayal. Love which from second to second shed happiness. But me?

I can't have the love that Raihana has. The greetings from our relatives are really warm. I was shocked by the attitude of Raihana who was so strong in maintaining my authority in the eyes of the family. To my mother and everything was never told, except flattering my kindness as a husband she loved. In fact, he claimed to be proud and happy to be my wife. I myself was dizzy with my attitude. More troubled by the attitude of my mother and my parents-in-law who insinuated descent.

One year my eldest son has been married, if there are no signs yet, even though I want to cradle grandchildren, "my mother said." God willing, soon the mother will cradle grandchildren, pray for us. Isn't that right, bro? "Raihana said while nudging my arm, I stammered and nodded blindly. After the incident, I tried to be friendly with Raihana. I pretended to be affectionate with him, as a real husband. Honestly, I was just pretending. Because it was not based on love, and not my own will I do it, this is all for my mother.

God Almighty. My pretense glorifies Raihana as a wife. Raihana is pregnant. He is getting sweeter. Families all rejoice. But my heart cries because love never arrives. O Lord have mercy on me, make haste dost Love as soon quick and witted. Since then I have gotten even more sad so Raihana, who is pregnant, I don't notice anymore. Every time my conscience asks? Where are your responsibilities! "I just shut up and sighed sadly." I don't know, how hard I found love "I murmured. And finally came that day, Raihana's gestational age entered the sixth month. Raihana asked permission to live with her parents for health reasons. and quantify him at home, because my in-laws' house is far from the campus where I teach, my in-laws are not suspicious when I have to stay rented out.

When I said goodbye, Raihana advised, "Mas to increase the cost of giving birth to our child, please later disburse my savings at the ATM. I put it under the pillow, the number is the same as our wedding date". After Raihana stayed with her mother, I was a little relieved. Every day I don't meet people who make me uncomfortable. I dont know the cause all of this. It's just that I'm a little troubled, I have to prepare everything. But it doesn't matter to me anyway, because I'm used to studying in Egypt.

Time went on, and I felt like I was enjoying without Raihana. One time I came home in the rain. Until the house was already late in the evening, I felt my body really weak. I vomited, shivered, headache and stomachache. When it crossed my mind, if there was Raihana, he would have prepared hot water, green bean porridge, helped treat colds by scratching my back, then told me to rest and cover my body with a blanket. That night I was really tormented and suffering. I woke up at six in the morning. The body is fresh. But there is regret in my heart, I have not prayed Isha and late morning prayer. Just a little felt, suppose there was certainly Raihana I did not leave the Isha prayer, and not late morning prayer.

The Raihana track is lost along with the teaching departure on campus. Moreover, I got the assignment from the university to take part in the quality training for lecturers in Arabic. Among them the tutor is a professor of Arabic from Egypt. I talked to him a lot about Egypt. In the training I also met with Mr. Qalyubi, an Arabic lecturer from Medan. He took his undergraduate degree in Egypt. He told of one life experience that he thought was bitter and had been lived.

Are you married? "Said PakQalyubi." Alhamdulillah, I have already "I replied." With which person? "" Javanese "." Must be a good person. Is not it? Usually returning home from Egypt many brothers offered to marry pious women. Most are not santri, graduates of boarding schools. Your wife is from a pesantren? "" Ever, Alhamdulillah, she is a scholar and memorizes the Koran. "" You are very lucky, not like me. "" What about you? " my heart isn't as miserable as it is now. "" How did that happen? "You certainly know that the Egyptian girl is beautiful, and because she was fascinated by her beauty I suffered like this. The story is this, I am an only child from a rich person, I depart to Egypt at the expense of parents. There I was with a classmate named Fadhil, a Medan person too.

As time went on, my first year graduated with the title Jayyid, a title that was quite difficult for students from Indonesia. Likewise with the second year. Because of my achievements, the host where I live likes me. I was introduced to his daughter, Yasmin. He doesn't wear hijab. At first glance I fell in love, I had never seen such a beautiful girl. I swear I will not marry anyone except him. In fact we have the same feeling.

My love story was heard by Fadhil. Fadhil made a clear line, ending the relationship with the host's child or continue with marrying him. I chose the second one. When I married Yasmin, many friends gave me this input, both married to Egyptian girls, why not seek out Al Azhar students who memorized the Koran, were pious, and veiled. It is safer than with YAsmin who is a layman of religious knowledge. But I remained firm to marry her. With high costs I managed to marry YAsmin. Yasmin demanded to be given something more than an Egyptian girl. Luxury home furnishings, stay in star hotels.

As soon as I finished my bachelor's degree I returned to Medan, I requested that assets in Egypt be sold for capital in Indonesia. We immediately bought a house that was quite luxurious in the city of Medan. The first years of our lives went well, every year Yasmin invited Egypt to look at her parents. I can still fulfill everything Yasmin wants. Life goes on, the cost of living increases, our third child is born, but income does not increase. I ask Yasmin to save money. Not every year but once in three years YAsmin can't. I was desperately doing business, for Yasmin's wishes and for the children to be fulfilled. My father's last rice field was sold for capital.

In me, regret began. Every time I see Egyptian alumni friends who live peacefully and peacefully with their wives. Good Knowledge implementation and able to do a great religious proselytizing. Loved by society. I did not get what they got. If I want to rending, I have to be calm. Yasmin doesn't want to know about Indonesian cuisine. You know, an Egyptian girl usually calls her husband by name. If there is a bit of a burst, then the house like hell. The peak of my suffering started a year ago. My business went bankrupt, I asked YAsmin to sell the jewelry, but he didn't want to. He compared his life with less cousins. His cousin got an Egyptian husband.

I'm sorry to put beauty above all else. I have been enslaved by her beauty. Knowing that my situation was stuck, my father and mother gave in. They sell houses and land, which eventually they live in a small and narrow shop. I cried. They hope that the capital is enough to pioneer my bankrupt business. My business began to rise, Yasmin began acting up, he invited me to Egypt. Time in Egypt was the culmination of a painful tragedy. "I'm sorry to marry an Indonesian, I want you to divorce me, I can't be happy except with an Egyptian man". Yasmin said, like a thunderbolt grabbing.

Then without sin he told me that at the Indonesian Embassy he had met his friend. His old friend had become a businessman, and his wife had died. Yasmin was invited to lunch, and continued with the affair. I hit him because I couldn't help myself. For this action I was reported to the police. What hurts is that no one of his family who defends me. Apparently, Yasmin often sent letters containing false news. Since then I have been depressed. Two months ago I got a divorce letter from Egypt and at the same time got a copy of Yasmin's marriage certificate with her friend. My heart was very sick, when the eldest son shuddered asking his mother to go home ".

Hearing the story of Mr. Qulyubi made me sob. His life journey made me realize. I remembered Raihana. Slowly his face appeared in my eyes, it didn't feel like I had already separated from him. Suddenly there was a longing that sneaked in hearts. He is a very pious wife. Never ask anything. Even what comes out is devotion and sacrifice. Only because of God's mercy did I get a wife like him. Even though my heart was wide open, Raihana's face had been lit on the wall. What is being done by Raihana now? What is the content? It's been eight months. Give birth soon.

I then remembered the message. He wanted me to redeem the savings. Coming home from training, I took the Muslim clothes shop, I wanted to buy it for Raihana, also a negligee, and baby clothes. I want to give a surprise, so he smiles to welcome me. I did not go directly to my in-laws' house, but it was a contract to take savings, which was kept under the pillow. Under the mattress I found pink paper. My heart rustled, my blood gasped.

Who is this love letter, I don't think I've ever made a love letter for my wife. Don't tell me this is my wife's love letter with another man ... Crazy! Could it be that my wife is "insane"? With fear I read the letter one by one. And Ya Rabbi it turns out that the letters are an expression of Raihana's heart which I have been zhalimi. He wrote, how he desperately loved me, dampened his longing for me. He strengthens himself to endure tremendous sorrow and suffering. Only Allah is the place where he mourned his grief. And yes "Allah, he still faithfully offered a prayer for the good of his husband.

And how much he wants the presence of true love from me. "Ya Rabbi with great gratitude, servant knelt before You. Lakal hamdu ya Rabb. Have honored servants with the Qur'an. If not for this great gift, surely I have fallen into the abyss of mischief. Ya Rabbi , give additional patience in the servant, "wrote Raihana. In the end of his writings Raihana prayed "O Allah this is your dwarf servant full of stains and sin again coming knocking on your door, anchoring this soul's sorrow to Your presence.

O God, for seven months Your servant has been pregnant with pain and exhaustion. But why is it that heartily my servant's husband doesn't care about me and abandons me. Still lacking what servant love to him. Still lacking what is the loyalty of the Kupadanya. What is still lacking in my devotion to him? O Allah, if there is still something missing, inspire your servant this morality that is more genuine for my husband. O Allah, with Your mercy, servant please do not anger him because of his negligence. I just suffer. Forgive him, with love I still love him. O Allah, give servants the strength to keep worshiping and glorifying them.

O God, you know that servants love him because of you. Convey this love to you in Your way. Rebuke him with Your rebuke. O Allah listen to the prayer of your servant. There is no God worthy of worship except You, Glory to You ". I could not feel my tears flowing, my chest felt tight by a sense of emotion that was extraordinary. I burst into tears. In my tears all the goodness of Raihana imagined. Her baby face and shade, sacrifice and devotion never ending, his voice soft, his delicate hands kneeling hugging my legs, all imagined flowing feelings of emotion and love.

In the novelty, there was a cool breeze coming down from the sky and penetrating into my soul. Instantly, the charm of Cleopatra has faded away from Raihana's love that comes to heart. Love and love for Raihan suddenly became so strong rooted in my heart. Cahaya Raihana continued to shine in the eyes. I suddenly missed him so much. I immediately chased the time to share my love with Raihana. I call my vehicle. I drove hard as my tears dripped along the road.

When in the front of mother in law garden, I almost cried. I held back with a deep breath and swallowed my tears. Seeing my arrival, my mother-in-law hugged me and sobbed. I became surprised and cried. "Where do you get, ma'am?" My mother-in-law just cried and cried. I keep asking what exactly happened. "Raihana? Your wife ... your wife and your child she is carrying". "What's wrong with him?" "He's gone." "What did you say!" Your wife died a week ago.

He fell in the bathroom. We took him to the hospital. She and the baby did not survive. Before he died, he told him to apologize for all his shortcomings and mistakes while accompanying you. She apologized for not being able to make you happy. He apologized for inadvertently make you suffer. He asked you to meridhionya ". My heart trembled violently." Ke ... why didn't you give me the news? ". When Raihana was taken to the hospital, I sent someone to pick you up at the rented house, but you were not there. Contacted to the campus he said you were training. We don't want to bother you. Moreover, Raihana advised us not to disturb your peace during training.

And when Raihana died we were very sad, so forgive us ". I sobbed. My heart was sad. My heart was broken. When I felt Raihana's love, she was gone. When I wanted to atone for my sins, she had left me. When I wanted to glorify her she had he has left me without giving me the opportunity to just apologize and smile at him, God has punished me with regret and innocence of guilt, my mother-in-law invited me to a new mound of land buried at the edge of the village. headstone, name and the day of death Raihana is written there. I can't resist feeling extraordinary love, emotion, longing and remorse. I want Raihana to come back to life. Suddenly the world is pitch black ...

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